A Couple Sports Posts

Every year, bad highlight films of superstar highschool athletes litter youtube. The music is too loud, the graphics awful and the video quality is awful. The hope is that the video will showcase their talent and get some coach from a big school to notice and offer a scholarship.

This is a fantastic goof on that theme. Meet the newest 5-star recruit..Mike Nobler


Now...under normal circumstances I would rather be forced at rusty knifepoint to participate in a Russian fart eating contest than sit thru :03 seconds of John Tesh...but this is cheesy and sorta funny and sorta cool all at the same time.

Mostly cheesy and worthy of goofing on...so enjoy. I particularly enjoy the Captain Crunch looking dude on violin battling the guitarist whom I think may have to take a shit. In any case, I think it's that dude that used to play for Saturday Night Live and looked like he had to take a shit when they did his close up on the way to commercial...so...either there are two guitar dudes out there too old to have long hair and frozen with a perpetual "gotta back one out" face...or it's the same dude.

For The Little Ones

Not sure what sparked the urge but I wanted to direct your attention to one video you may not know...and one that you probably know but if you don't, you will not soon forget. Both will kick you in the shins.

First, A short from Dave Hill. It's from a web series for the defunct Super Deluxe:


Millions of viewers have marveled at the littlest superstar. Simply hypnotizing.

Flammable?

Are you fucking kidding me? This marks the height of our Douche Bag nation. When a backwards robe and slippers just isn't casual and comfortable enough...enter...The Hoodie Footie.

It's official...we have outbred and/or outsmarted nature and overcome natural selection. We're past the fork in the road. We took the left at Albuquerque. Mother Nature sighs, knowing she's been defeated...decides to take a nap in her brand new Pink Hoodie Footie.

Bad Local Commercials

Local commercials possess the ingredients that I enjoy most. Sincere desire to create something great..coupled with a complete lack of talent to execute.

EyeTech Productions


Ealgeman


I believe these guys who did the Red House spot actually make the commercials bad on purpose...which might be harder than making it good on purpose. In any case, I like the outcome here.

The Red House

It's Still Real To Me Damn It!

This is from a couple years back...some local panel of wrestlers from some podunk Mid-Southern-Atlantic-Regional-Tri-State-Wrasslin-Federation-type of organization offers a chance for fans to talk back to the wrestling superstars...in a high school gym. One dude really appreciates their efforts.


Also...I didn't care for any of the Super Bowl Ads. A couple were decent. However...it's very cool that there's a place to see every Super Bowl Ad from last night.

The Monkeysphere

We are all monkeys. As such, we can only care about so many people in a meaningful way...behold the theory of the Monkeysphere.

http://www.cracked.com/article_14990_what-monkeysphere.html

No Direction Period. Bob Dylan

A really good Bob Dylan piece from a couple of years ago.

A Couple More Classics

These are old but I love them. Watch them again even if you've seen them. They hold up over time.

Shit My Dad Says

I don't need to explain this link much more than to say that this dude just started posting things his father says.

Simple. Elegant. Hilarious.

Dude just got a sitcom deal out of it too.

http://shitmydadsays.tumblr.com/

Stern Stuff

A couple great things from the world of Howard Stern.

A great game with wack packer, Beetlejuice
http://my.howard.tv/beetle-mismatch-game

Richard and Sal make prank phone calls:


Here they call a show called, "Tradio". It's a super Christian radio show where you buy and sell stuff (a radio ebay)... with an old redneck fucker for a host. Richard and Sal call up trying to sell funny shit and purposely racist shit to goof on him. If you've got 9 1/2 minutes...this is freakin great.
**Note** almost every call is either Richard or Sal. So great.

Worst Rap Battle in the History of Mankind

If you think the host sucks...hang around for the rapping. If you think the first rapper sucks...PLEASE hang around for the second dude, Eli...aka MC Cringeworthy

Howling at the Moon

When my wife and I visit her parents in Canada, I always make a point to take a stroll thru a store called Giant Tiger. It's like a drug store without the drugs with stuff from years ago...but somehow awesome in every way. I buy a pair of sandals every year from there for a whopping $8 Canadian. I bought this gem back in December and haven't hardly taken it off.

It was between this and a huge pissed off bear face hoodie. Or another wolf pattern...or...and I think I'm going to send my mother-in-law on a mission...a huge eagle.

Anyhow, I opted for the black-background-multi-wolf-moon-howling-thingy-pattern.

$14 Canadian dollars
100% Polyester.
100% Pussy repellent
The only thing you'll attract with this is dog hair and sideways glances.