How You Feelin' Toronto!!?

This is one of my favorite internet finds in ages....

As evidenced by the fact that I haven't updated this damn blog in nearly a year. Well...here it is...the thing that made me come back.

What is it, you ask? Good question. The description completely underserves the reality.

Description: Paul Stanley of KISS talking to crowds in between songs
Reality: Today's rock stars are way too cool for this. I'm both thrilled and bummed at this truth.

Throwing Mechanics

Guy from Argentina makes short film showing dudes throwing rocks with their opposite hands.

Either that, or it's the South American tryout tape for the next Florida Gators QB. Either way, it's pretty funny.

Men Throwing Rocks With The Other Hand from Juan Etchegaray on Vimeo.

Three Buzzword Gem

Often times, the combination of 3 words in a title can make or break something. For instance, Vacation Bible School. (I stole this joke for the good of the argument). Those are 3 things that no kid really likes. And furthermore, you can't put any 2 of those words together and get excited...

School + Vacation
Vacation + Bible
Bible + School

Now let's take a look at the genius of this movie's title...

Computer Beach Party. All are winning combinations here.

Computer + Party - of course
Beach + Party - what are you, an A-HOLE?
Beach + Computer - it's a stretch for the 80's culture but I'll allow it here.

Bonus points - we get to go backwards in time and make fun of not only the fashion and haircuts of the past...but also of their stupid understanding of their lame Utopian Future.

The only other time I've observed such wizardry in nomenclature was a place in Acapulco called, "Sexy Club Gym". Didn't go in but I'll bet you 30 pesos and a Jarritos Grape drink that it kicked ass in every one of those categories and there wasn't a Bible or classroom to be found.



COMPUTER BEACH PARTY
(from Found Footage Festival)

Better Bring 1001 Knives To This Fight

Because I believe the internet has become an inside joke about a meme about an inside joke...I believe this might be a fake video. Because I also realize that the dumbest people procreate and make smaller, younger dumb people that voraciously consume pop culture and mimic horrible behavior without awareness that it's horrible...I believe this may be real. Either way, Krispy Kreme has made out with a female that you know. Yeah...maybe even your mom. And also...yes, I do believe that may be a snot trail running down into his wispy mustache. But look man...don't underestimate him just because he ain't "vurry tawll." That would be a mistake.

Cuatro De Mayo Turd Taco

If by chance, you are coming to the end of a long week wherein, yet again, you had to navigate the usual turd infested waters in the sea of humanity surrounding you...I have good news. Some of them record themselves on video for people to (unintentionally) laugh at years later. Guess what...? Today is years later for the class of yesterday's turds. Do it for the "you" of yesterday. Or at least watch because these old crappy videos are pretty funny. I WANNA PIZZA!!...to crush your f*cking soul... more recent but with extra goodness. karma clown says, "wait for it". Roughly translated to English from his native tongue of Doosh-B'AHG...the word UZZY is slang for "thud".

Sticky Buddy

I wish this was the real commercial for the Sticky Buddy.

Time for Drama

This is a great idea with terrific execution.